What to Do When Your Boyfriend is Still Online Dating
Met a third and was blown away. Cat — I feel like your situation is more straight-forward. My suggestion would be for you to let her know where your head is at. For those of you that ask why about how I found his profile, my friend created a blank account to check her dishonest husband a few years ago, and I logged on with her permission …my profile has been down for a long time. He gave me a key to his place also and told me to stop by whenever.
Step 3: Talk about it.
We got on amazingly well. But you never know until you take action. Then I noticed that his profile was still active. I know he got my messages yesterday i messaged him on facebook and it tells you exactly when he read it which was this morning around 8. No search term specified.
But when those unique dating situations suddenly become your present reality, you still feel like a deer caught in headlights no matter how many books about polyamory or open relationships you may have read. Why mess it up with my own emotional hangups and insecurities? Katz makes a great point in one of his blog posts about this very dating dilemma online. I go there to buy. I go there to swim. But then he did a complete less than 24 hours later.
Nothing amazing has ever come out of those four words. My heart sank as the truth I had already known finally started to come out. The issue now is figuring out how and in what capacity. But then again, so would your partner. CMB is a dating app designed with women in mind. Founded by 3 sisters in in NYC, CMB aims to deliver a fun, safe, and quality dating experience that results in meaningful relationships.
She likes playing sports, exploring new places and trying new things. You can usually find her hanging out at a coffee shop, in a bookstore, or on a softball field. The best way to see this clearer is to flip the situation over.
You have different needs, different goals, different perceptions — no reason for anyone to get hurt. How do you do that? Either way, you have your answer. I did this three years ago and it worked perfectly. Was dating two women casually. Met a third and was blown away. I dumped the first two and instantly took down my profile for 3.
When 3 saw my profile was down, she asked me why. I told her, matter-of-factly that she was why. Removing my profile is what I wanted to do. And if she wanted to go out with twenty other JDate guys before taking her profile down, she could. As far as I was concerned, going on a bunch of dates would only reinforce why she should be exclusive with me. Yes, a little ego goes a long way. There are two possible scenarios: Actions speak louder than words.
The latter is the more likely scenario. But you never know until you take action. Better to get an answer now than to wait another two months to find out where you stand. Currently, this female happens to be seeing someone and in the exact same position. And, truth be told, I am not sure if we are both checking on each other and prolonging the chase or not.
I am an old-fashioned, of sorts, and believe that any man should take the lead- right or wrong this is where my beliefs lie.
And since the gentleman I am dating has not mentioned it, I do not want to limit my options for fear that he is dating many different people. Rest assured, though, in my case as long as I see his active I will continue to be active. My suggestion would be for you to let her know where your head is at. Too, I have many friends who will follow in my same footsteps and wait for the man to take the lead. Hope this helps, and best of luck to you! Are we dating other people?
He is only thinking about him. If after dating for almost 3 months, he is still having his profile s open, then…he is just a bunch of BS, clearly not that into you regardless if he takes you to nice dates on the weekends.
He is clearly still looking around. I was enrolled into a dating site, after a couple of weeks of dating this guy, I took my profile of the air…almost 3 months have passed by and even though I talked to him about this, he still wants his profiles open…so not into me!
Last night I opened my dating profile again. Since I posted this question, I went to the web site I found him on and put mine on there. I felt guilty and the next morning I removed it. He found me on there in less than 12 hours! He has the right to look at what?
Have you had the exclusivity discussion, and agreed to be exclusive? If not, he certainly does have the right to look. That seems to me to be exclusive. Is that not to a man? He thinks he has the right to look online and then when he dates a little before getting physical he can tell you.
If what you want is exclusive, you need to be very specific.. If he still wants to have a profile up and look around.. Keeping his profile up means not only does he want to look at women, he wants them to look at him.
I totally feel you. He is funny, warm, love and treats me to everything… However, I took my profile but he did not. All my guy friends have been telling that I messed up by sleeping with him, but that he clearly likes me. I have the same problem, BB… BF of 4. We got back together after less than a day though I broke up with him out of haste and anger of something else he did. So he said that he would take it down since it bothered me. If you like someone enough to see someone several times each week and have sex with them, there would be no need to continue looking and having your profile active.
Unless you are not serious about the person or are using them to pass the time until someone more interesting arrives on the scene.
Your reasons for joining online site. The truth you reveal about what it is you are seeking in your profile. The honesty between you and the person you are seeing regularly. The conviction behind your reasons for joining and your honesty with those you date. Remember that your actions and words should align.
The other person will catch on and know something is not right if you contradict or omit your intent. Being vague about your intent and checking the site while having giving the impression you are developing a relationship with one person is shady behavior. Word travels fast and unless you care about how you treat people, consider reexamining your disclosures and intent.
Be fair and above all else, have a conscience and empathy for the other person. The statement I made: You spend time with them and their kids. And tomorrow is another day so the answer may be different without warning.
But for those who do not wish to take the hard line of interrogation, this would be enough to establish trust that they are working on knowing YOU and not everyone else on the dating site. It should be a relief. That same person is willing to subjugate their own kids to partners coming and going at an exponential rate. It does not whisper quality. The same courtship rules in real life should apply to online dating.
Convenient truths of the moment are not genuine and border on deceptive. Every day they are hecking out the goods online time he or she is NOT checking out you and what you have to offer. The basic considerations of traditional methods of dating have not changed with the advent of online dating.
Friends can be found on meetup dot com or other avenues. Hook up sites are for hooking up. The profile should reflect their intent and you should call bullshit if the two do not align. Look out for yourself and be careful. You may not only be screwing the village idiot but all the others he or she is lying to.
Imsges: the guy im dating still active on match.com
Second, in your response to Cat, not all guys are like this. No search term specified.
Search or use up and down arrow keys to select an item. Are you both okay having profiles up and options available? We went to a spa, it was beautiful and we ended up staying the night together……..
Why mess it up with my own emotional hangups and insecurities? The guy im dating still active on match.com after a week his is still up, you could try dropping hints: I called him 3 times when i was off work and then it started going straight to voicemail… not sure if he turned the phone off or what… The 2nd day i texted him at am and asked him what was going on. I think you should work on figuring out where you stand with matc.hcom guy and making sure you happy with in that is. Match member ignorance is not a defense.